YO NUKKAS! its christmas time. i'm happy right now.but earlier today and yesterday i was pretty bummed.. dont know why. just out of it. sat in church today, felt evil as fuck. i didnt want to hear anything. but i did. and i ate the jesus, but i didnt drink the wine. (i was raised catholic, so we drink wine & eat communion). it was a weird experience. on the way home, my brother was telling me how he cussed out my dad for some shit that he always does.. lets us down. all i could think about was the many reasons why my father may commit suicide, hoping he doesnt, but knowing there are reasons. i want him to cry.. so id want to hug him. and i want to hug my brother. that's all. merry christmas eve! presents tomorrow ;) ill letcha know what i get.
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